The King Buffalo is Back

You had to be there

2006-03-28T19:48:00.000-07:00

Adam:"Well this shirt says 'Save the Trees, wipe your ass with an owl'."
Adam:"And this sweatshirt says 'Superior Video'."
Adam:"But I don't see anywhere where it says 'Company Nigga'!"

It's like a burrito....BUT FROM SPACE!!!!!!

2006-03-26T19:56:00.000-07:00

Hey it's been a little while i guess. But i figured that after the deliberation over the name of this site it deserves some attention. Well things have been going....well they've been going, and that's better than them not. I've been working at a warehouse for the last 7 months and although some of the people i work with are pretty cool, i'm starting to go a little crazy working there. Now i know what you're all thinking, i was already crazy to begin with, and i don't really blame you for stating the obvious. In any case i'm thinking it's time for a change, it's been 6 years since grad, it's time. Time to take control of my life, time to not be sitting in a Denny's on my birthday realizing i was sitting in one the year before. Not everything has been bad over the years though, i've made some true blue friends, the kind that will stick with you no matter what, i've met the most unbelievable girl that i let get away by no one's fault but mine, who still haunts my dreams to this day. I still see her everywhere. But the past is just that, past, only way to go is forward. Strangely enough lately i've heard the phrase: "Do what you love, and love what you do," alot....I mean, i've heard it before, but it's just seem to have surfaced around me frequently in the last little while. Now if anyone could just suggest what it is i'm meant to do, that would help alot, maybe it's something i don't see in myself but others do? In any case, timebetter way to celebrate it than with another tattoo! I'll see you all around.

BTW....WTF???!

2005-09-05T20:40:00.000-06:00

ok forgot to post about the weird ass comment left on my site by some random guy who has a random website about......well to tell you the truth i haven't the slightest clue, but it's completely fucking messed up. So here check it out, and you know, feel free to leave spam-like comments on his site too.Here

Let the Mayhem begin.

2005-09-05T20:30:00.000-06:00

Well upon hearing the good news, i have thusly been spurred into posting. About what you might ask? Well i shall tell you...absolutely nothing, just like any random episode of Seinfeld. So what news you might ask? Well what other news is there than MIKE'S COMING BACK TO THE MOUNTAINS!!! And by mountains i mean BC and not some hermit house or anything homosexual like that. I can already see that destruction the Mike shall wreak upon the helpless villagers of the City of Vernon. That's right i said, City...can you still spell that word Mike? After living in the mind-dulling speedbump that is Vulcan for so long. Side note: Both places start with the letter V, coincidence? I THINK NOT.! Anyways i'm certain that all our out of town parties will now take place at Mr. Eng's residence there, that is of course whether he chooses to disclose that particular location is the deciding key. I concur. And so i leave you all with this random quote of nonsense.."I don't really like the berry flavour....it's too......i dunno, berry-ish"

Yeehaw!

2005-07-24T20:16:00.000-06:00

Well due to some rather half-assed harassment from Mike about not posting, and even though i'm sadly dissapointed in his lack of effort, i shall post anyways. What to say...ok firstly in regards to my accident, and the situation of Ester the Beat Up Dirty Whore, she has been renamed once again....to Ester R.I.P...that's right folks, the green lady of the night is now dead. Officially. So that's that, however i'm still fucking waiting on ICBC, in regards to my claim, so i can possibly get SOME money back for my car. So i can buy a new one, that and waiting for my driver's license is getting boring, and frustrating that it's taking soooo long. And sadly i'm not in the mood to post anymore, so this will have to do for now.

Recap

2005-06-03T17:09:00.000-06:00

Ok well it's been an interesting last couple of weeks, so probably about time that i should recap for ya'll. First item of business, running security for a grad house party is both fucking hilariously fun, and OH MY GOD we're gonna get our asses kicked unnerving. Secondly, just because you're in your mid-fourties, and are driving a sebring convertible while listening to "I'm too sexy" by Right Said Fred, and we pass by you in a 77' Trans Am killing ourselves laughing, does not mean you should humiliate yourself even more by revving your whiny V6 and speed past. This does not mean you've redeemed yourself, and you are not "The Shit." Yoda and Hans are the shiznit, and that's a fact. Thirdly due to some poor personal judgement on my behalf, Ester has unfortunately been renamed from Ester the Frigid Bitch, to Ester the Beat Up Dirty Whore, in short, i was in an accident and now my car looks like i ran into an elephant's ass, meaning, there's shit everywhere. And last but not least, been getting serious with guitar related stuff, and i think we've figured out a band name for ourselves...but that will come later.

2005-05-19T21:49:00.000-06:00

James: "i don't have much of a sweet tooth, i mean if someone offered me cake and ice cream, i'd much rather have wings and beer.....or just wings....or just beer!"

2005-05-15T15:46:00.000-06:00

James: "Holy CRAP I'M FULL!"
James(again like 2 minutes later): "She looks like Death"

Another day another $24.95 bologna sandwich.

2005-05-11T21:58:00.000-06:00

Phew, i'm fucking tired, not smart to get home from work and head out for the night immediately. Then return home, hit the sack, sleep for 5 hours, go to another long day of lots of work, and finally while waiting for the bus decide to walk downtown and catch the bus there, besides i had an hour, plenty of time. Time wasn't the problem, my shoes were, in that they suck. Looks like i now know where part of my first paycheck is going, shoes, insurance, gas, rent, and beer money. Anyways, that was all normal, so i'm sitting at home eating some dinner, and glancing over the help wanted adds in the paper...and i came across this one(and no i am not shitting you):

Cheaper than a bologna sandwich - Telephone Reconnect!! First month service only $24.95 + connection fee! i'll stop it there, cause first of all who even likes bologna, and second if you're paying 30 bucks for said sandwich you deserve to be shot, then have a bologna sandwich shoved all over your face, and shot once more for good measure.

2005-05-04T16:31:00.000-06:00

Yay! I gots me a job! i'm gonna be working at Nature's Fare, which is a health-food/grocery/vitamin/deli place! lol. The people seem awesome, and it's good, cause i'm starting to run low on the low funds i was already low on to begin with. On another note, Eric STILL hasn't finished getting all his mess of crap up to his and Nic's new place. That and i don't believe they have any heat/electricity/water yet lol, meaning: NICOLE SMELLS! So now i just need to insure my car. Ugg and get it checked out, stupid Ester the Frigid Bitch, she's leaking oil. Started listening to a whole lot of Collective Soul lately, beats me as to why, just kinda out of nowhere.

2005-05-02T18:42:00.000-06:00

Ugg....today..was..interesting. Got woken up this morning at about 8ish by Nicole and Eric needing help moving today. So i said no problem, sure i'd help. That was before i realized that Eric has packed NOTHING! lol. Nic has spent the last two weeks packing her stuff into boxes and bags, and putting it all outside to be ready to take. Eric..not so much. In fact, absolutely nothing at all. We walk into his room and it's chaos, he didn't even think ahead about his fish tank(which is gonna take another entire day all to itself). So we spent 3 hours just getting all the big crap out of his room and decide what he's keeping and what he's throwing away. Eventually settled on two couches, a couple of shelving units, and 4 UN-USED SUB BOXES. He does have a plan for the sub boxes so he kinda redeemed himself there, untill he told me WHAT his plan was...apparently he's gonna use them for coffee tables lol, now these things aren't really square, so they will be rather unique i guess. So after using like 40 bungies to strap everything onto a flatbed trailer, and one tarp, came the drive all the way across town to their new place. Lol except that we had to keep stopping cause the tarp was flying all over the place, that and we realized the lights on the trailer didn't work, so we had to resort to hand signals while driving.."I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!?" lol. After we get more or less everything unloaded, that's when Eric's friends show up, perfect timing eh? Luckily the couches were light and we didn't have any problems getting em in the house. Next came Nic's dressers. Those suckers were HEAVY, but Eric and I managed to He-Man them out of our house and then again into their new place, UP the stairs, nearly killing ourselves, and the wall with us. Buuuuuuuut it's all good, finished now, nothing left to do but head up there..and get smashed.

2005-05-01T12:48:00.000-06:00

I hadn't realized how many almonds i purchased, untill today. i took a look at the bag and it's a 3lb bag of almonds! That's bloody insane! how the hell am i gonna eat 3lbs of almonds! it's baffling really. now if mike were here i'd offer to share some with his almond deprived self, but instead he's sitting at home, wishing his non-existant land lord would turn down the heat, for even though it's -1 outside, the house will be heated as if it were -45. did i mention it's 28 degrees here right now? no? ok well i did now. so nice i think i'll go for a swim, but not so soon after eating all these almonds, might get a stomach cramp and sink to the bottom of the pool and drown and die. on the other hand, this is exactly what mike most likely wishes upon me and i wouldn't want to dissapoint him.. so i guess i'll just meander back outside, almonds in hand, to lie basking in the sun, sleep, and get sunburnt yet again.

2005-04-28T21:21:00.000-06:00

So as i sat outside today, eating some almonds and enjoying the 24 degrees celsius, i thought to myself "i wonder what it's like in alberta right now?" So like i normally do when i'm curious about alberta's goings on, i turned to mike's site and checked out the little weather icon on the bottom right..-9!!!!!! OHHH MAN i was enjoying that. *sigh* oh to be back in bc, where the weather is normal, it's not + 20 one day, and then -5 and a foot of snow the next. Whereas here, in kamloops, since i've been here has not been less than 20 every single day! Ahh so loverly. These almonds are good too.

The Adventures of Bjom and City Transit

2005-04-22T18:12:00.000-06:00

Is there anything better than missing a bus? I think not. Today's random story involves a person who shall be called....Bjom. Say theoretically, Bjom has no insurance for his car, and so when he needed to go downtown to finally file his taxes for the year, he would most likely choose the bus as his transportation, though only because his friends weren't at home so he could possibly catch a ride. So anyways, Bjom makes it downtown without a hitch, he did however think he had missed the bus, but it was in fact just late. So back to downtown, well, there was a complication with his information regarding his taxes, and so was only there for 10 minutes. So time to catch a bus back home, but the bus wasn't going to be there for another half hour, so Bjom decided to walk since it was such a nice day out, and it would've been a shame to waste it. So as Bjom is walking along the route of the bus....the bus passes him a half hour later when he's nowhere near a bus stop to run to, he was on a bridge. So Bjom decides what the hell, it's still super hot and nice out, i'll keep walking, i'm in no rush anyways. Another half hour later and Bjom has now walked half of the way back to his house already, when he finally stops to get a drink of water.....and watches as the bus goes by. Ok now it's really hot out, and Bjom wasn't smart and was wearing black. So Bjom was roasting, and sweating rather unattractively. So finally Bjom decided to SIT AND WAIT, for the next bus. Lucky for him it wasn't long of a wait. Thenbjomcamehomeandwashedhiscartheend.

2005-04-21T21:24:00.000-06:00

Well you know you've moved back to town, when you're driving with a friend and his truck breaks down, and you have to call every person you know in order to get a ride home. Gotta love how it's as far away from your house as can possibly be too lol. That's all, i just wanted to let you know that broken down vehicles will most likely be a large portion of my posts for the summer, that and beer. later all

Hell has frozen over..

2005-04-21T12:32:00.000-06:00

Ok you know things are messed up when you start listening to ABBA..lol..I don't know why, or what demon is controlling me, but i'm seriously loving ABBA right now, as odd as that may sound. The job hunt is slowly coming along, proving to be more difficult without an insured car, or even one to borrow from the folks. But i'm crossing my fingers for a job at the liquor depot out past valleyview, they pay 15.80 an hour and are hiring, helps that i have a friend on the inside, so if i could get that it would be great. Then can get my car back on the road, cruisin around, in this CRAZY NICE WEATHER!! wooooooooooooo. damn this ABBA is catchy.. On another note, i got dragged to see Sin City last night. The movie was visually really cool, but confusing as hell, i didn't know what to expect when going in, and came out about the same. I don't want to give anything away so i won't elaborate on it for now. Well back to my ABBA, later all.

2005-04-19T10:55:00.000-06:00

It's been a little hectic here in kamloops already, I got in saturday night, late. Then sunday just puttered around for most of the day. But it was sunday night that was interesting. The choir i used to sing with was having their dress rehearsal sunday night, so i had decided/was dragged to, to go and just see everyone and maybe just join them for a couple of numbers. About halfway through the rehearsal, all the members of the choir had asked me at least once if i was singing with them at the concert monday night haha. Here i am sight reading all the music and they want me to sing with them! Of course the decision wasn't mine to make, it was the choral director Nora-lee. Eventually one of the guys in the choir outright asked her, well he more stated, that i would be singing with the choir at the concert. Her response "Shaun can sing as much as he likes." So anyways of course with MY luck, this concert is the first ever concert where the guys haven't worn black dress pants, but khakis instead...mine were forgotten back in calgary..So here i am in the middle of the day trying to find a cheap pair at good old VV. I found a pair, that in all logic should fit me, according to the sizing tag INSIDE the pants. Let's just say it was really hard to breathe in them, but i toughed it out. The concert went pretty good except for one or two screwups on my part, overall pretty damn good for getting the music the day before. After the concert, it was off to Kelly O's for drinks and 2 for 1 appies. Where my cousin and I were sorely disapointed by the "Jerk" chicken wings(super spicy is the description), not to say that they didn't taste good, but just not that hot. So now i have to give Jenny a shout so i can go see her irrigation disaster that is her new house, so that's all for me today.

I AM ENRAGED!!!

2005-04-17T12:15:00.000-06:00

Well back in kamloops folks, so i'll make sure i get in touch with those of you who are here, as to why i'm enraged see the most recent Fuck Pete post here

Make like a tree and Leave version: 2

2005-04-15T16:59:00.000-06:00

Well the time has come, i'm finally heading back to kamloops, and can hardly wait. Got lots of stuff to do when i get there, such as finding myself a job and meeting up with old friends. All in all it's looking rather good, got a couple of job options available to me, so here's crossing my fingers. Not that i need luck, with my sparkling personality lol. Anyways, hopefully i'll make it back in time to check out the Serious Options spring concert on monday, but i won't know till i finalize things. On another note, went to check out some "rollerblade" paths at a provincial park here in the calgary city limits. And i have to say i'm sorely dissapointed, these paths though numerous, are in such bad condition they are impossible to blade on. Example, you know it's bad, when you need to stop and WALK on the pavement with your blades on. Other than their quality, the trails would be pretty cool, they go on for approx 15km from start to finish, but there are lots of different routes. That's all for me right now, and as Margaret Chandler, Remax Agent, would say : "These werewolves are stunning..."

EDIT:: I'M COMING HOME TOMORROW!!!!

Make Like a Tree and Leave

2005-03-31T15:34:00.000-07:00

My grandma has been here visiting and helping prepare for my aunt's upcoming move back into her old house, and since she's been here i've heard some of the most ridiculous sayings ever. Of course they're sayings from the stone ages, but still they're pretty bad. Nowadays, some of the sayings out there i will admit are a little stupid, but at least they make sense. Such as "I'm all over that like a fat kid on a smartie." I actually no joke listened to my grandma say "In there like a dirty shirt...." Ok..Fat Kid-Smartie, not hard to see the connection there, But wtf does In there like a dirty shirt mean!? I asked her about it, and she doesn't even know!! Another one she said to me was in response to a statement i had made "damn we're out of beer" to which she responded with "5's try a game of 6's"..........Ok whereas the first phrase she used actually visually gives you an image, this second one here...well..i'm just baffled to say the least. After a couple of minutes i just had to give up trying to piece some sort of message out of them both. Now excuse me while i have a nice relaxing anurism.

Pretty

2005-03-28T17:23:00.000-07:00

A day will come to find you,
There'll be no words to say,
What it feels like to be here and to go away,
I never say what I think,
The sound is too disturbing.

When you are all alone,
There'll be no sound to hear,
To help you understand how it feels to disappear,
I never say what I think,
Words can be so misleading,
When you are all alone I will be here.

Fly up so high to find out how falling angels feel,
When skies come crashing down.

When all the pain is gone,
It will be calm inside,
A scarred and tired heart never will be denied,
I never say what I feel,
You're pretty and so unreal,
I'll never understand my foolish pride.

Fly up so high to find out how falling angels feel,
When skies come crashing down what will the stars reveal?
Inside the burning ground it's too late to save me now,
When skies come crashing down.

All fall down.

Fly up so high to find out how falling angels can feel,
When skies come crashing down what will the stars reveal?
Inside the burning ground it's too late to save me now,
Fly up so high to find out how falling angels feel,
When there are no places to hide no hidden truths to conceal,
Inside the burning ground it's too late to save me now,
When skies come crashing down.

This is the final sound,
An angel hits the ground,
The stars will all fall down.

S-Bomb in the Hizeeeehouse

2005-03-24T21:12:00.000-07:00

Yo yo yo this is S-bomb here, with tons of tales to regale you addoring fans out there. Looks like M-Fizzle is gonna be packing up his Nintendo Ds, a box of crackers, and a salami, and heading up to Calgary for the weekend. Don't know how much time we'll actually get to hang out, he'll most likely be busy killing innocent little animals. But more normal on the list of things to do, is watch every movie that's playing right now. Everything from and including The Jacket, Constantine, and who could forget Diary of a Mad Black Woman. I have absolutely no clue as to the story behind that last one there, but the name alone would inspire me to watch it, unless it's a documentary....then that's just not gonna happen. These movies will be broken apart, by the usual visits to Denny's and or Harveys. Harveys only if Grog is working though, cause without Grog, Harveys has got nothing, except good food, but i mean COME ON!!! NO GROG!? OH YEAH! So that's all for today, cause after writing this i have this undeniable urge to sneak out into the night and off somebody, thus making tomorrow a liiiiiiiiittle less crowded.

2005-02-21T00:12:00.000-07:00

Just a couple of quotes.

Mike: "Don't break my couch... cause it's not mine"

Kim: "I can breathe through both my nostrils!!!"

OMGWTF

2005-02-08T20:54:00.000-07:00

Ok this is old freaking news but apparently sometime last october Vancouver's Science World was changed to the TELUSphere. This is complete and utter bullshit!!! However i don't think i can top Jenn's own ranting about the subject so you can check it out here! And that's it for me today cause i have massive garlic breath and i hurt my back..

2005-01-31T14:06:00.000-07:00

Overall, this past weekend was quite fun, full of many gut-wrenching laughs and complete randomness as usual. However, yesterday i had to have had THE worst luck in one 9 hour period ever.

Mike came up this weekend for some sort of work related workshops(More Info) So Friday we decided to check out a movie mainly because we didn't know what to do. I still don't know Calgary that well, such as what the hell you can do here. We more or less just wind up driving around or watching movies. Anyways when i drove to meet mike at the hotel he was staying at FOR FREE, a massive Death-Fog descended on calgary, making it impossible to see more than 10 feet ahead of you. The fog was rather intense, and it wasn't just in one spot, it was everywhere. Before the movie we went to the usual place..Denny's, which is a block away from the theatre. I think they're actually starting to recognize us. We checked out Assault on Precinct 13. It was an ok movie, up untill the end of the movie when all of a sudden out of nowhere they are in a forest, where no explanation as to where this 'forest' came from or how the hell they got there.

I spent most of saturday lounging in Mike's hotel room charging numerous amounts of Room Service in his name, as well as watching 8 movies on pay per view, also in his name. While he spent his day sleeping during the one seminar he managed to make it to. So Sat was laid back, and I was just chilling being very bored in the hotel room, when all of a sudden the phone rings, so loud that i didn't know what was happening until the blood stopped pouring from my ears. It was Mike down in the lobby. "Come down here NOW, there's a really funny comedian!....NOW!!!" So down i went to listen to the last half of this guy's show. And he was very good at his job. After the show back we went up to the room, where we really didn't do anything for the rest of the night. We had entertained ideas of heading down to the hotel bar cause we had thought some guy had said it was free to people here for the convention-thingy, but truth be told we were too lazy to move.

Sunday.....sunday ruled and sucked at the same time. This was the day that my luck just stopped all-together. The day started off with mike slamming the door to the hotel and waking me up from a deep sleep, I followed this with an evil glare. Then it wasn't too bad for awhile. We had asked the Consierge where we could find a mall close by, to which he responded with "What kind of mall?".........What kind of mall? A MALL! He then explained that there was a chinese mall over "that way," which was not at all accurate. So we kinda just drove around and located an A&B sound by the motel, and went there, as well as a Best Buy, and this crap-ass store that called itself Dollar World. Now we think there has been some miscommunication in that definition, cause a typical dollar store is you know..A Dollar, or two or three...Not $23.56
So that store sucked. So we get back to my car and we're driving through an intersection and an oncoming car drives through a puddle, splashing an arc of dirty water through my open window and onto me. I didn't say anything for a couple of seconds before I started ranting away while Mike is nearly killing himself laughing at me. Next stop was a Taco Bell, neither of us had ever eaten there, and i've been seeing these comercials for this Steak Quesidilla that looked really good. It tasted like someone stuck ground beef into bread. Sadly dissapointed we decided to then drive downtown to this street i've wanted to check out since i've moved here. While driving back we found the Chinese Mall, which had a Cheap Movie Theatre, and not to mention SUPER MEGA DOLLAR STORE. After noting that there wasn't anything there we wanted to see, we exited the mall parking lot, oh i'm sorry i meant to say while TRYING to exit the parking lot some moron decided to push his shopping cart down the middle of my lane...Not even noticing me, and not moving untill i had to swerve around him into oncoming traffic. Mike has compiled a nice short list of my mishaps yesterday, this one included. Eventually we made it downtown and after getting lost, i mean searching for a parking space we proceeded to the street i wanted to check out. Except like usual we got sidetracked and wound up on a parkade taking some cool photos. After that we FINALLY made it to Stephen Ave, which has some really cool old buildings, and for the most part is a pedestrian only street. We took some more photos before heading into a super cool looking A&B sound, yes the second one for today, but we just wanted to see the inside of an old bank building, it was really cool up to the point where we left and the automatic door started to close while i was going through and getting caught on my jacket and dragging me back to crush me. That was the exact point in the day in which I officially admitted defeat, my spirit finally squashed into oblivion. Which actually was picked right back up again about 5 minutes later while walking down the street, some guy was heading towards us and as he passes says " I love Chinamen!" To which Mike and I stiffled our laughter untill we were a safe distance. Then it took us 45 minutes to walk what should have been 2 blocks back to the car, except for the fact that we took some interesting shortcuts. So after walking ALL day and laughing for about 9 hours straight we were both exhausted, solution: Denny's lol. After eating food while laying in the booth like an escaped mental patient, off to the bus depot to send mike packing back to Vulcan, thus ending one hilarious and event-filled weekend!

P.S. I'll let mike write about the FREAK we saw by the comic shop!

Complete Ineptitude

2005-01-25T21:33:00.000-07:00

For lack of anything better to write about today, i shall write about COOL words. Now you don't have to agree with me on these words, but if you don't? Well then you're an ASSHEAD! Haha, ok well first up on the list would have to be Ineptitude, where it would seem that someone took the words In, EP, and Titude and molding them into one completely awesome word. Word number two, is excellent in three different forms, Vex, Vexing, and let's not forget Vexed. Which is not only a wonderful drink to get you tipping the scales in the "holy crap i'm pissed" department, but an excellent way to say "man this is pissing me off!" Next we have Farfignuten. Now this isn't a new type of Fig Neutan cookie thingy, it's.....ok truthfully i have absolutely no idea what it is, BUT AS IF IT ISN'T COOL! Come to think of it, it may not even be a real word, oh well. Ok this post i've also declared that i will not use the Paragraph, it may drive mike insane but well tough luck. Shnozz. There is NO better word in todays proverbial society that can better describe a giant honker. Shnozz. Haha i just laugh saying it. Ok mike has just tracked down and translated my name into Japanese while i've been typing, and i have to say my name sucks, i mean i like and all in English, but in Japanese it really kinda blows.

sho-n arufureddo ramonto....
Man that is complete crap, why can't it be something cool like: WAAIIIIIIIYAHHHHHHH!!?

Ok back to the words, and I just realized that I accidently used a paragraph, damn, foiled again by KEITH. I will get you soon KEITH, very soon.

So words yes words are good, such as on page 338 of the Official Scrabble Players Dictionary, 14th word down...Mukluk. I don't believe there is anything else i can say on...Mukluk. Except that it's well...Mukluk. Enough of that crap, I've decided to save THE best animal name for very last, and as i can no longer think of any cool words this will have to be the end of this completely and utterly useless post. That animal is, that's right you guessed it the WOMBAT!!! The animal in which i take my alias from.

Wombat: any of several stocky Australian marsupials (family Vombatidae) resembling small bears.

And thus ends this crap which i call writing.

2005-01-24T18:10:00.000-07:00

Ok...i must mentally prepare for what i am about to say. Amidst the chaos that was my last post(see previous post), there was a comment left by KEITH. Now some of you might say: "Keith? oh yeah i know Keith, he works down at the local broom supply store." But you would be sadly mistaken. For i believe that Keith is actually an assassin hired by some U.S. government agency. Hired....to ELIMINATE ME. Case in point, his comment:

At 4:22 PM, keith said...
And I heard, as it were, the noise of thunder.One of the four beasts saying, "Come and see."And I saw - and behold - a White Horse.

That is most definetely some sort of secret spy code, utterly unbreakable by anyone. But you see Keith, I am not anyone, I am...SLOW WOMBAT!!! My baffling genius is surpased by none. So after only mere minutes of reading your 'comment' I have discerned what will be your undoing. You see KEITH, if that truly is your real name, everyone knows that I don't like horses, so you obviously must have anticipated that I would become violently enraged with the mentioning of *shudder* horses. So your plan was to blind me with rage while gaining access to my secret lair and planting some sort of airborne disease into the ventilation. Ahh but with my PURE AWESOMNESS i have foreseen these events, and injected myself with a tranqualizer as to not fly off into a fit of unbolstered rage. You also unintentionally gave away the location of your oh so secret base of operations. It's all there in the code Keith, one merely needs to look, oh but I won't be telling where that is of course, must keep you on your guard....Till next time..KEITH...you have to sleep sometime. Muah..Muah..Muah hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

2005-01-23T16:55:00.000-07:00

As promised i bring to you the actual conversation between myself and Mike, that determined the naming of this new blog addy!

!WARNING! viewer discretion is advised. Brain aneurysm may occur after reading such a brilliant conversation.

shaun: i'll be back, in the meantime i changed the template on the old one, lol yeah you're right, oh and keep thinking of a new blog name for me
shaun: ok what names have you got for me
mike: uhhh
shaun: nice and short i like it
mike: SHARKBURGER.blogspot.com
shaun: lol
shaun: that's awesome but hard to type
mike: it is kinda
shaun: that rules though
mike: dude
mike: ohyeah.blogspot.com isn't taken
mike: O_O
mike: now that is easy
shaun: lol actually Yeah is rather hard to type i constantly fuck it up
mike: lol
mike: :P
mike: okay...
shaun: but i'll use it
mike: really?
mike: ohyesah
shaun: OH YEAH
mike: i messed it up too
mike: oheyah
mike: oheyah
mike: ohyeah
mike: lol
shaun: lol
shaun: told you
mike: ohyeah
mike: ohyeah
mike: ohyeah ohyeah
mike: oheayh
mike: ohyeah oheyah ohyeah ohyeah oheyah ohyeah hayeh ohyeah
mike: hmm
shaun: hahahaha
shaun: now onmyown
shaun: that's easy
mike: nah
mike: too much right hand
mike: onmyeaoh
mike: lol
shaun: FARTINGONTHEBUS.blogspot.com
mike: dude
mike: oh yeah ended up in my "onmyown" attempt
mike: BY ACCIDENT
shaun: Dude.blogspot.com
mike: taken
mike: of course
shaun: MMMPIE.blogspot.com
mike: lol
mike: OMG
mike: ham.blogspot.com is available!!
mike: :-O :-O :-O
shaun: OMGWTFBBQ.blogspot.com
mike: HAM
shaun: where the hell did HAM come from again?
mike: catsby and twisp
mike: how does it taste HAM
shaun: lol
shaun: oh right
shaun: AGONY.blogspot.com
mike: lol
mike: taken
shaun: seriously?
shaun: lol
mike: yeah
mike: estherthefrigidbitch.blogspot.com
shaun: lol that would be funny
mike: yeah
mike: haha
mike: man
mike: could get an awesome header graphic too
mike: of the inside of your car, like panoramic all frosted
shaun: hahaha
mike: boogie.blogspot.com is available
shaun: Oooo
shaun: tempting
shaun: very tempting
mike: lol
mike: http://bananaphone.blogspot.com/
shaun: hahahahaha
shaun: that's it
mike: haha yeah
shaun: omg that's hilarious
mike: look at these
mike: http://deco.blogspot.com/ http://dude.blogspot.com
mike: WHAT WASTES
mike: no wait dude is normal
mike: http://pie.blogspot.com/
mike: pie is dumb
shaun: actually dude is kinda cool
shaun: if you read it
mike: yeah that's why i said "no wait dude is normal"
shaun: yeah i saw that
shaun: omg PIE was back in 01
mike: i know!
shaun: that's nuts
shaun: and ONE POST
mike: so was deco
shaun: i might as well go with OHYEAH
mike: OH YEAH!
shaun: should i have !!
shaun: OHYEAH!.BLOGSPOT.COM
mike: no
mike: it won't let you
shaun: DAMN
shaun: oops
shaun: caps
mike: exclamation marks aren't valid web address characters
shaun: the problem is i don't have hosting for pics
mike: ahh but you could
mike: http://www.photobucket.com/ for example
mike: it's a free site that lets you upload pics and use them on other sites (unlike tripod)
mike: so is www.flickr.com
shaun: meh i'll worry about that when i have my own computer, cause i don't really want to be downloading and uploading crap on this one
mike: ah
shaun: might be too much for old bessy to handle
mike: haha yep
shaun: i thought you said ohyeah was available?
mike: isn't it?
shaun: says it's not for me
mike: damn
mike: someone might have reserved it
shaun: ohyeah.blogspot.com taken
mike: but if you type it in nothing comes up
mike: onmyown is taken too
shaun: damn
shaun: well i'm screwed then
mike: inthebear isn't
shaun: haha
shaun: hmm
mike: shit unless me trying just took it
shaun: kinda hard to type
mike: (...)
mike: inthebear
mike: inthebear inthebear inthebear inthebear inthebear inthebear
shaun: ot bad
mike: lot easier than ohyeah
mike: lol
shaun: i just suck
mike: OT BAD
shaun: too bad you're doing that Pureawesome thing
mike: hm?
shaun: well on your site there's a link that say Pure Awesome
mike: ohh
mike: right
mike: no
mike: it says pure genius
mike: :P
shaun: ohh
shaun: hmm
mike: lol
mike: you can have http://www.swapphotos.net/ if you want :P
mike: it's mine
mike: but i never use it
mike: it's got hosting
mike: buuuut i have no idea until when
shaun: pureawesome is taken anyways
shaun: lol
mike: lol it could just disappear anyday
shaun: yeah no thanks
mike: haha
mike: when you get a comp you could use it for online space though
mike: nick uses it for his photo pages
shaun: cool
shaun: i'll do that
shaun: WHEN i get a comp
mike: ya
shaun: bustagroove.blogspot.com
mike: no
shaun: too long
mike: meh i just don't like it
mike: haha
shaun: lol
shaun: damn i wish ohyeah wasn't taken now
mike: yeah that sucks
shaun: totally
shaun: inthebear is stupid though
shaun: oh oh oh
shaun: side note
shaun: i just now realized what the tarot cards were trying to tell us
mike: lol
shaun: with all the damn buffalos
mike: KINGBUFFALO.blogspot.com
mike: oh man that'd be so good!
mike: haha
mike: ok what were they saying
shaun: they were trying to tell us to get the buffalo style chicken thingies instead of the crappy sweet and sour
mike: ahhhh
shaun: lol king buffalo isn't take
mike: haha
mike: that would be interesting
shaun: should i?
mike: kingbuffalo
mike: easy to type!
mike: kingbuffalo
mike: kingbuffalo
shaun: kingbuffalo
shaun: NICE
mike: kingbuffalo
shaun: ok totally getting that one

2005-01-22T01:38:00.000-07:00

Ok anyone who reads this must immediately go and download or at least check out William Shatner's cd Has Been. It's fucking awesome lol!!!!

2005-01-21T18:05:00.000-07:00

Being here in calgary all by my lonesome, not really knowing a lot of people, has allowed me to become introspective these last few months. One of these such moments happened at work today, when i was knee deep in a conversation with a co-worker that i really do not like, talking about something i really had no interest in what-so-ever. So i took that time to think alot about me.

I've learned a few disturbing things about myself after moving out here, as well as some really good things. Among the bad, i say the word 'Dude', wayyyyy too much! An example was that conversation in which i was not paying attention at all, more or less just humouring the guy, even though he did most of the talking i said 'Dude' a total of 34 times in a ten minute time frame. 34!!. I'm still not even sure how that's possible! It was this notation of the 34 'dudes' on my fingers that ultimately allerted my co-worker that i was not paying any attention to what he was saying. Of course not that i cared, the sooner he shut up the better.

Another, if not bad then strange, realization is my fondness for loud noises, or just loud anything. This one i pondered over after passing a homeless guy on the street and he was kinda mumbling. Then all of a sudden he just kinda blurted out "AUuhghhhlily," to which i had to turn and muffle my intense laughter. Other evidence lends itself to this particular topic as well. You see, many of the inside jokes that Mike and myself have, are just one or two words, shouted or screechily said. Such as "HEY CAN I GO IN THE BEAR?!", "OH YEAH!!", and let's not forget "FEEEEACK!!". If someone could explain this ultimately strange fascination to me that would be greatly appreciated.

There's also the fact that when you've lived somewhere for your entire life, and it starts to eat away at your brain, subsequently driving you batshit fucking loco, to the point where you just want to run away from it all, and once you do... You find yourself missing it more than you had expected. Wishing you could just drop everything and go back to that place, that life. That ever after living in a new place for almost half a year, it still doesn't feel like home. They say "Home is where the heart is." Does that mean that my heart isn't here? That somehow it got left behind back in Kamloops, just another personal item i forgot to bring? And why is it I long for the place that was rotting my brain? Haha maybe i'm just a sucker for punishment.

The saddest part is that i'm beginning to believe that some of the reasons that i gave for as to why i was moving out here, were merely justification for all that i would leave behind. Such as my tentative plan to possibly attend SAIT and do radio broadcasting. The more i dwell on the idea, the more i tend to question if i truly meant that, if i would actually go into that field. Truthfully i can't see myself doing it. Sure i had fun when Mike and i put on our own little show, but that was just us screwing around(which was a blast, don't get me wrong), and although everyone says i'd be great at it, and is pushing me to do it, i'm still not certain if it's for me. If it's what i WANT to do.

Well anyways, i'll get by and eventually figure it out, besides where would the fun be in planning everything? lol, ok enough self-realization for this month. Time for the loud noises!! OH YEAH!!!!

2005-01-20T17:50:00.000-07:00

Well well well, if you hadn't noticed i've decided to start up a new blog. One that represents my new life here in calgary. And i figured why not start off with a glorious quote!

Heather:(right after i walk through the door into the house) "The load limits are too much!!"
Me:"what?"
Heather:"the limits they're heavy"
Me:"ok i have no clue what you're talking about..."
Heather:"I'm worried about the shload shlimits!"
Me:"ahhh...." And at this point is when i ran and hid in my room fearing that some sort of demonic beast has taken over my Aunt. The next day however she warrily approached me and stated that i must've woken her up when i came in, and that she must've been talking in her sleep, while she was thinking about the load limits in thinking ahead about moving back into her old house. Which is kinda strange.

Anyways I hope that most of you are wondering why in hell my blog address is KINGBUFFALO!!!!! And for that i really have no rational explanation, other than this: You see last night I decided to do the new blog, and was desperately racking my brain for something i could use. So of course mike was helping me out, trying to stimulate the intelligence juices, when we thought of OHYEAH.blogspot.com, which seemed as though it wasn't taken. I thought that i'd hold off at first though, see if i could come up with anything better. ONMYOWN.blogspot.com was another idea, it being my fav song, and kinda a double meaning when you think about it. Then there was a flood of stupid ass names that we would never use but we had to get out there in the open, like, DOPUSSTOPSHITTINGONTHEFLOOR.blogspot.com, and FARTINGONTHEBUS.blogspot.com, the latter being an inside joke between mike and myself. So after a few more like those, i decided what the heck i might as well use ohyeah!!, BUT, although when you typed in the addy nothing came up, apparently it was taken somehow, so that was rather baffling and upsetting. So on to second choice, onmyown. Also taken. Now i'm getting frustrated trying to think of something cool, when out of nowhere a though pops into my head about something that happened on the weekend that i forgot to tell mike about. What happened was we found some Tarot cards in my aunt's office, and proceeded to read our fortunes, and mine kept coming up with all these damn BUFFALO, like ACE OF BUFFALO, and PRINCESS OF BUFFALO, it wasn't till later that i realized what they were trying to tell us. Because that same very night, mike and i decided to grab us some KFC, this new Sports Bucket which had some chicken, these little boneless chicken pieces, and potato wedges. You could get the boneless thingies in two flavours, Sweet and Tangy, and BUFFALO style! We got the sweet and tangy, not fully realizing the tarot cards, cause they really weren't all that good. So anyways as i'm telling mike this hilarious revelation, he says KINGBUFFALO.blogspot.com, which we both laugh non-stop over, then realize that would be a pretty damn cool blogger addy! So there you have it everyone, hopefully mike has the msn convo recorded so that i'll be able to post that, cause it really makes no sense what so ever. So i'm back everyone, ready to thrill you with amazing and most likely retarded stories from the plains of alberta, where me and Esther the Frigid Bitch are getting along just fine.